I've gotten really good at talking. I'm having an easy time chatting up people, talking confidently and making genuine connections with complete strangers, even beautiful girls. I've also overcome my awkwardness with physical touch and became effortlessly touchy.Only thing is: how do I make it sexual? Yesterday I was in a club and had many amazing connections with girls. They really opened up to me, genuinely liked me and we had a great time. But when I get to this point, I feel like there's no way to go "back" and make it sexual. It would feel inauthentic, like I was just pretending to be friendly until they let their guard down. However, if I opened very sexually I would feel like a creep, and it would probably keep me from making these awesome connections. Girls never feel sexual around me, although I'm reasonably fit and have what I think to be a decently looking face.I also have to admit that while I am confident socially, I'm super self-conscious sexually. I just don't feel like fucking when I meet girls in social situations, I feel like "this is fine", although I know I'll regret it as soon as I'm home alone. Any /adv/? I'd take anything at this point.tl;dr how do I get proper game
It's not about WHAT you say. All that matters is HOW you say it.Tone. Pitch. Word choice rolling off the tongue. All a key into crafting sexy dialog.>F "Whats a good replacement if they don't have hennesy? Im getting a bottle to someone who helped me move" >M "Can't go wrong with Jameson and I can show you why in front of a fire when you're moved in"Take premise [What drink should I get?]Then inject an answer that includes yourself [Jameson, let me show you something]Finally a description preferably clear but not overly vivid so it isn't cring[Sharing a bottle front a fireplace]It invokes intimacy, heat, comfort, and loose fun. You wont find this type of advice anywhere else so do me a favor and feed a crow as a token of appreciation if you actually follow the process. >Go fail 1000 times in order to get it flawless once
>>31142184Just insert some original compliments about their body.Also say something as if she has a boyfriend.She then will confirm she is single.Then she could start turning up the heat; don't retreat.
>>31142354awesome advice, thanks. do you have some practical ideas on how I could, uhm, "exercise" this kind of interaction? when I've already connected to a person I feel like it would be a waste to burn that conversation just to get my 1000-fail-mileage in. is tinder a good place to start?
>be maleI have an assignment to do with my female friend. We agreed that we will meet at her place. I went there and greeted her mom and we headed to her room to start working. The weird thing that I found annoying is that her mom would bring in snacks every 15-30 mins. Sometimes she would pop into say or ask something. She wouldn't linger that long but it was obvious that she suspected that I was going to harm my friend. I'm kinda infuriated right now. I didn't tell her anything about this. I want to make sure that my assumption is correct. What does /adv/ think?
It's more likely, to me, that she was making sure there wasn't any "funny" business going on, kind of the opposite of harming her if you know what I'm saying haha.
so i have a slightly unusual story>be me>highschool dropout>spend time traveling/hoboing around, camping in the woods (do that intermittently my whole adult life)>after a few years teach myself 3d art>eventually get good and manage to get work>get a decent income, not rich but ok>travel around europe while working>this is actually much cheaper than living in the US, as monthly airbnb's in places like eastern europe/germany/northern sweden are cheaper than rent in the US, and cost of food is also lower. I don't have a visa so I have to hop countries every 3 months.>3 years ago market starts becoming way more competitive, and at the same time have a huge decline in my mental health and cognitive function. as a result no longer able to support myself remotely, have to go back to the US>the main issue effecting my performance is a bad porn addiction/internet addiction which fucks my brain and attention span and renders me mostly useless>unfortunately my work demands I use the computer/internet>have to go back home to do regular low-income work>now I'm stuck in my homeland of the US, which I fucking hate, and I desperately want to go back to europe. time is rapidly running outComment too long. Click here to view the full text.
We broke up two weeks ago. I reached out to see if she wants to still wants to make up and work on our relationship. She sent me this.Does this sound like she just wants to keep around as a backup if her next guy(s) don't work out?
>>31139096>you wasted your time before this woman was even old enough to be dated legally.Uhh where on earth is 20 underage??
update: she came over. we fucked twice. talked for 3 hours. Still not getting together though, mutually.
>>31139096you are right. I'm a weirdo. She came over and was all emotional. I was too. Then we fucked and I got those feelings i had before the breakup that i didn't want her anymore. But two days later ill miss her again.
>>31139096>
>>31126918I can translate that for you.>if you really want to then yes i can get back with you but first let me get stretched out by some random dicks. Also when we get back together you need to try twice as hard and this time i will also be FAT.
How can I get my sick cat to the vet when they all have 6 week backlogs for appointments?
>>31142219Regularly call and ask if there's been any cancelations. You'd be surprised.Check other clinics around and do the same if it's critical treatment like kidney failure.Check for vet colleges nearby, they will do supervised work for a discounted rate. It helps train new vets while also helping your little fren.There is two final options, but only reserved when all hope is lost and you wish to not see your buddy struggle.>Death>Rehome program, it's fucked up but there is a program for animals to recieve 90% of medical treatments completely covered however the catch is the animal will be rehomed to new owners. I don't agree with this because it deeply traumatizes the animal which it would most likely find greater peace among the dead than to be scarred while alive forever wondering why you abandoned them.
>>31142219Emergency vet.
>>31142306Another alternative - look locally or in nearby cities for vet walk-in clinics. They may have long lines, but you're at least in the door.
I feel unlovable because I used to be a prostitute and am in sex addiction therapy. In therapy though, my therapist is great
I hate working more than anything in this world. I hate having to be up at a strict time and having to leave my house to do something i hate to pay my rent. What's worse is that it's physically taxing. I'm only 34 but my back feels like it's 54. I'm buying a camper within next 2 years and dropping the fuck out to live around free public land. I might work 1-2 days a week as a dish bitch to pay for food and water and fuel but beyond that I'm so fucking done. I'll kill myself if I have to keep spending a third of my life working. every moment i spend at work i feel this intense head pressure and a desire to leave. i have been homeless several times because my hatred for having a job outweighs my desire to have a comfortable home until I finally break from not being able to shower after months. i cant wait for the day i fuck off and don't have to contribute anything to some asshole for little in return.
>>31142429whats worse? being an ex prostitute or being a wizard?
>>31142442What
>>31142446A wizard is 4chan slang for 30+ year old virgin, I feel like that's about as bad as ex prostitute as far as fucking up sexually. I wonder which is seen as worse though.
Why do women prefer older men?
>>31142214>working in a female majority workplace will make you either sick of talking to them or just feel sorry for them since all they seem to do is just viscerally hate each other instead.More the former than the latter. It's becoming a female majority since a lot of guys are sick of the shit and are taking other jobs. I'm pretty sure it's going to go under when the last of us have left.The older women are alright though, they hate the bitchy stuff and know what's up. They're getting out too.
>>31142192I can go again. I just have very little oomph to do so.
>>31142226sounds like we work in very similar environments anon.>The older women are alright though, they hate the bitchy stuff and know what's up. They're getting out too.yes, 40+ and especially if they have kids tend to be pretty chilled out and approachable.really makes you think if women just need to have a family and stable connections with some people so they aren't just a hateful ball of insecurities that feels the compulsion to start shit for no reason.
>>31142267I think it might be more age than a family. One woman is about 32 and has 2 kids, but she is an absolute nightmare. It seems the only normal ones are about 40 or older, whether with kids or not.Every guy is fine though. The really young guys are immature as hell, but mean no harm to anyone and don't talk any shit. It's one young guys very first job and he pulled me aside to ask if what was happening is normal kek.
>>31136942successful older guys have far more dominant behavior and often a total lack of childishness that every 20 year old guy has, even the coolest ones. i work with a lot of alpha 20 y/os at law firm but they have childish behavior as expected. some young man goofiness. certain girls cant feel dominated by younger guys because of those “immature” behaviors. thats all it is. id say this isnt most young girls, probably 30%. an 18 y/o girl (non american) is about as mature as a 30-35 y/o male. they mature far faster for rearing children
So I have been dating a lot since my break-up and out of all the girls I have met two of them are absolutely incredible and perfect but for vastly different reasons.I have been torturing myself the last two weeks over deciding on which one to commit to but then I thought "Wait, why not both?"Does anyone have any experience with this? They both like me a lot and I think there is an above 50% that I could successfully orchestrate this.Thanks in advance. Just one of those Icarus situations yk?
>>31142412Terrible idea. Just pick one and roll with it. I've been into two for a while, but I picked one over the other because:1. She has more experience raising kids2. She's mature and doesn't gossip or spread false rumors3. She doesn't seek attention from everyoneAsk yourself which one shares your values more, and go with her. If you go for both you will lose both.
>>31142412Just go for one, follow your heart
>>31142425What makes it a terrible idea? I would be committed to both.>>31142427I swear to god I feel in love with both of them
>>31142412Yeah, go for both. Lie and cheat as much as necessary to keep it going. The three of you will then end up with exactly what you deserve.
>>31142443I would be honest with them about everything
How do kind people live in this cruel and individualist world?
>>31139784I took my time in thinking about this, and the answer that I have come to find is:They live just like us.
By either being discerning who they share their kindness with, or being at the mercy of people who see them as an easy target.
>>31139784When you are spiritually enlightened you see through the illusion of separation and suffering, knowing that we are in this dream together, and all reflections of the creator, you can treat others with kindness and compassion.
>>31141648You're not enlightened, kid.
>>31142115Neither are you bucko
Just realized I got raped when I was a kid and that's why I feel so horrible all the time. What am I supposed to do now?
>>31141102Demons are real. They're coiled thoughts that "possess" the mind. Nothing more than that.
>>31141092But anon, why do you feel anxious? Are you scared that people will find out and you'll be embarrassed? I'm praying for you anon
>>31141092I myself concentrated on my stuff... but I lost a lot of time in my life.I don't blame the person, though. she was a teenager at the time. I blame my mom and family in general for not taking care of me.>>31141840this website is for adults. try talking to your parents (assuming you can trust them) or someone you can trust (a teacher of whatever), also talk to a psychologists, and report your rapist to the police.
Go to therapy. I was molested by my dad when I was little and it fucked me up. Work on your sexual trauma, don’t just go to therapy and listen, actually do the homework and exercises they ask you to outside of therapy. Next, grounding, work on meditation and grounding techniques. Find a hobby you enjoy and try to work towards a small goal for your better self. For example, if you struggle with keeping your room clean, pick up some clothes every day for a week or two, then add more to that small goal. These rewards are exponential, no matter how small, you will always be better from the moment you started. Find something little you enjoy and endulge but not to escape, just to relax. Like a bath or a book or a walk. Start eating healthier and exercise. Exercise is the best treatment for a lot of mental health issues.If you really think you need it, see a psychiatrist, ptsd can be treated somewhat by medication.
>>31141092Therapy - not because there is anything "wrong" with you, but for PTSD
I have adhd and I'm socially retarded. I can't go into group conversations and be a normal person. I'm very shy. I've gone into new groups of people and not said a word. This makes people think I'm a weirdo. I've had friends I've known for years witness this and stop wanting to be my friend and hate me. This makes me avoid any group social situation with new people, because I know I'll just shut down. How do I fix this realistically?pic related: me, driving away from every new social event
>>31140141My brain simply shuts down and I can't think of a topic to discuss/banter.Then I realized I genuinely have no way to connect to anyone because of my autistic interests no normal person has.It's over.
>>31141577I have the same issues, brain shutting down and the ideas in my head seem unworthy of sharing. It sucks major dick. I even have similar interests to people and just cannot talk about it in a meaningful way. Other people banter and it looks fun but I'm not nearly quick enough or comfortable enough to banter consistently. I feel like it's not necessarily over but where the fuck can grown men find social places to develop and learn these skills, especially when you're fucked mentally
>>31139238True. Aspergers take a lot longer to develop than normies but we aré much stronger. We make More mistakes because we aré from the future.
>>31138539Find situations in which you are DOING something, in the company of others also doing it. You automatically have something in common, and the doing will cover any gaps in conversationSports team, volunteer work, random evening class, museum tour, etc
>>31142408Yeah, that seems solid. I'm gonna try to do new sports and volunteering. Classes are cool but I've had some bad experiences with juust, people hating me in the classes i've taken. And I never make friends, I have a lot of trouble connecting iwth people. I guess most of these places have normal people that get annoyed by autistics and such folk.
Aside from avoiding ovulation days, what's the safest way of doing it raw? Sex with a condom is miserable for me
>>31139589Marry a woman you love and have children with her. Never worry again. Sex is for procreation.
>>31139622Probably her belly button. That's how sex works, right?
>>31139697IUD>>31139703or this>>31139982>>3114029011k and 4hr surgery to get it reversed, seriously think about it. mine was a mistake and it was such a pain in the ass to get it undone
>>31139589ive gotten many children with many girls at this point, most were “by accident” (i lied about pulling out)i have 0 way for girls to collect anything from me like child support so just do whatever i want. frankly im trying to do us all a favor as the only white guy that fucks on this board but some tranny will bad-father shame me. cant win em all
>>31139589>Aside from avoiding ovulation days, what's the safest way of doing it raw?With femboys. Your nut could look like Niagara Falls and it still won't be enough to get them pregnant.It's the only way to be safe.
Is it worth to try dating if I don't have my own place and live with parents? Or is that too big of an obstacle
>>31138819Low self esteem is a bigger obstacle but fixing that is a matter of the spirit
>>31138819If some bitch cares you live with your parents, especially in this day in age, she's not worth it anyway. Yeah, date as much as you can.
>>31138819depends on your age and everything reallyHow old are you?What are you doing right now?What are your goals?If you are still studying, planning on doing this job, then getting your own place it shouldnt matter, now a days housing marking is shit in many countries.But if you are 30+ and still work a dead end job at mcdonalds then obviously its gonna be a more dififcult time
>>31138819Ive dated a couple bitches while being a total loser living with my parents and no car its worth a try.
>>31138819ITESIt's the economy, stupid.In some places more than 50% of 20-somethings live with their parents, just because there are no affordable apartments. A lousy state of affairs, but it does mean there's no stigma to living at home
How can someone live a life where no one is interested in their being? Like having no friends, no close friends, no social life, no gf, no nothing?
Most of my life I've had only a few close friends. Overtime my friend groups have dissolved so I've lost most friends-instead just spending time with randoms online.Now, I work a job where I don't really have access to that and am around strangers as coworkers for about half the year (travelling job); spending the other half just with my own brief escapades.Point is: it's easy if it's gradual. If you just lose all your friends over time then you just kind of get use to doing your own stuff and you don't really think about it.Friends aren't needed when everything you do is already a solo activity.
>>31142134most relatable answer
>>31141743That's every man in existence. Most survive for a long time even.
>>31141906NTA but this reply is a gaslight. A lot of people have been punching bags repeatedly, it isn't just their "perspective" of only seeing the bad. People don't completely choose their friends it has to be mutual. It seems likely to me that anon chose to be friends with who was available and has learned his lesson that it wasn't worth it. There are always dirtbags who want another toady to abuse. People who learn to say no don't often graduate to better people they learn to embrace solitude.
>>31142189I'm not sure what you mean by "gaslight."My point was not that anon only sees the bad in his experiences, but that he does not acknowledge his own part in them. Obviously, we can't force anyone to be our friends, but as you said, it has to be mutual, and nobody can force us to be their friends. I have had abusive friends; they can do a number on your self-worth, make you feel like a bad person when you don't let them abuse you, undermine any positive feelings you might have, sabotage your other relationships, your job, etc. But as the saying goes, fool me once...You can accept solitude, but it doesn't sound like either of you are embracing it. I know I'm not.
My daughter was diagnosed with stomach cancer, the cost of the operation was $20,000, including a discount for low-income families. I had to sell everything I had to raise some of the money, about $3,000, and took out a loan for $5,000. My friends helped me with a portion of the amount, around $1000, and now I’m looking for all possible ways to earn money, I work as a taxi driver 18 hours a day. I have no relatives, since I came from an orphanage. I wanted to know if there is any way to earn some money in crypto or is it worth collecting a little at a time? It’s just that my daughter doesn’t have much time and at the moment I’m afraid that if I save money for a long time, she simply won’t live to see this day. I would like to sell my organs, but in our country this is prohibited. And now I don’t know what to do, after all this I can’t look my daughter in the eyes, she probably deserved a better life and a better father and it’s all my fault that I’m so helpless and can’t let her live in peace.Can I ask for help here, I can provide any evidence and confirm everything that is written hereI understand that no one will help me for free, because of this I am ready for any work and any complexity.
